Quote of the Day: Judith Viorst on Marriage

If you’ve been waiting for permission to stop panicking about a relationship’s “off season,” let this insight from Judith Viorst be your exhale: “One advantage of marriage is that, when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again.”

The line is funny because it’s true, and useful because it’s humane. We’re taught to treat love like a constant flame: if it flickers, something must be broken. But real partnership runs on cycles. Energy dips. Stress spikes. Attraction gets crowded out by logistics. Viorst reframes those stretches not as evidence of failure, but as weather.

What, then, is the “advantage” she points to? Structure. Marriage, at its best, creates a container sturdy enough to hold two imperfect people while feelings change. That container buys you time to choose commitment over mood. It protects you from making permanent decisions in temporary states. And it invites a more practical question than “Do I feel it today?”, namely, “What would help us find our way back?”

Applied well, this becomes a daily practice: when you notice distance, don’t dramatize it, design for closeness. Make repair normal. Speak before you stew. Ask for what you need without turning it into a trial. Falling back “in” rarely arrives as lightning; it’s usually built through small bids for connection and quiet acts of love.

Judith Viorst has spent a career translating complicated emotions into clear, memorable truths, across children’s books, poetry, and memoir, using wit as a bridge to wisdom.

Today, do one thing that makes “us” easier: send a specific appreciation, schedule a 20-minute walk together, or ask, “What’s one way I can lighten your load this week?” May you keep choosing the relationship long enough for tenderness to find you again.