Barbara Deming Biography Quotes 21 Report mistakes
Early Life and EducationBarbara Deming was born in 1917 and grew up in the United States, developing early interests in literature, theater, and the arts that would shape her adult life. She studied at Bennington College, an environment known for nurturing creative thinkers, and began to see writing as both a craft and a way of examining moral questions. These formative years equipped her with the habits of close observation and disciplined prose that later gave her political essays their clarity and force.
Early Writing and Film Criticism
Deming first made her mark as a writer and critic. Fascinated by popular culture's power to reveal social tensions, she wrote about the movies of the 1940s, tracing how film images project longing, fear, and the promise of change. This strand of cultural criticism culminated in a study that read mid-century American films as a dream portrait of national anxiety and desire. Even in these early works, the through-line of her career is apparent: she looked for the moral choices beneath daily life, asking how people could live truthfully in a conflicted society.
Turn Toward Nonviolence
Her decisive turn to nonviolence came as she immersed herself in the writings of Mohandas K. Gandhi and the example of the modern civil rights movement. She was deeply moved by the disciplined courage of nonviolent action and by the insistence, associated with Gandhi and with leaders such as Martin Luther King Jr., that opponents be confronted without hatred. Deming would translate these insights into a distinctive feminist voice, arguing that nonviolence was not only a tactic but an ethic rooted in mutual recognition.
Civil Rights and Peace Activism
During the 1960s and 1970s Deming placed herself in movements that challenged racial segregation and militarism. She joined campaigns in the American South and participated in actions that often led to arrest and imprisonment. Those experiences became a school of thought for her writing: she analyzed what it means to resist without dehumanizing the adversary, and how to maintain solidarity under pressure. Her essays appeared in the peace movement press and brought her into working relationships and debates with prominent organizers, including figures such as David Dellinger and A. J. Muste, whose commitments to nonviolent direct action resonated with her own. Deming's voice, sober and exacting, stood out for its refusal to romanticize struggle while insisting on the possibilities of moral transformation.
Feminism, Lesbian Visibility, and the Two Hands of Nonviolence
As the women's movement grew, Deming became one of its most searching theorists of nonviolence. She articulated what became known as the "two hands" of nonviolence: one hand extended to the opponent, acknowledging shared humanity; the other withholding cooperation with injustice. She argued that both hands were necessary for a movement that sought not to crush an enemy but to change relationships. As an openly lesbian writer, she insisted that feminist politics include the realities of lesbian lives, and she worked to connect struggles against sexism, homophobia, racism, and war. Her essays explored anger, discipline, hope, and the practicalities of organizing, and they helped many activists think more clearly about how ends and means must align.
Major Works and Intellectual Contributions
Deming's published writings trace a movement from cultural criticism toward political philosophy and firsthand testimony. Her study of American film culture revealed her eye for the moral undercurrents of popular art. Collections such as Revolution and Equilibrium and We Cannot Live Without Our Lives gathered essays in which she tested nonviolence against the hardest cases: entrenched racism, state power, and internal movement tensions. She also wrote about jail and courtroom experiences, reflections later collected in volumes that showed her method, precise, personal, and unsentimental. Across these works she returned to a few core ideas: that nonviolence demands courage and candor; that the opponent must be fought but not expelled from the human circle; and that movements fail when they sever moral insight from strategy.
People and Communities Around Her
Deming's life was interwoven with artists and activists who sharpened her thinking and sustained her resolve. Her longtime partner, the painter and writer Mary Meigs, was a crucial companion as Deming shifted from literary to activist work; their relationship blended art, critique, and experiment in living. In the broader movement, she engaged with peace organizers such as David Dellinger and learned from the earlier generation's nonviolent philosophy associated with A. J. Muste. The example of Martin Luther King Jr. clarified for her how a disciplined mass movement could turn moral vision into social power. Within feminist and lesbian communities, she corresponded with and supported writers and organizers who, like her, sought to build a politics that was both principled and effective.
Institution-Building and Support for Women Artists
Committed to practical support as well as theory, Deming put resources in the service of women's creative work. She helped establish a fund that gave modest grants to women writers and artists at a time when such support was scarce. That fund, later known as the Barbara Deming Memorial Fund and often called Money for Women, extended her ethic of solidarity into an enduring institution. By backing new voices, she widened the circle of cultural production and linked artistic independence to broader struggles for equality.
Later Years and Ongoing Influence
Deming continued to write, organize, and mentor through the last years of her life, refining her arguments and returning to questions of discipline, love, and power in movements for change. She died in 1984. In the decades since, activists and scholars have returned to her essays for their clarity about the temptations of violence, the uses of anger, and the necessity of steadfast, public truth-telling. Her concepts are cited in discussions of civil resistance, feminist strategy, and restorative approaches to conflict. The grantmaking fund that bears her name continues to introduce new artists and writers to one another, extending a community she helped form.
Legacy
Barbara Deming's legacy rests in a rare combination: rigorous prose, field-tested analysis, and a life that risked comfort for principle. She stood at the crossing of several currents, literary modernism, civil rights, feminist and lesbian liberation, and the peace movement, and insisted they speak to one another. Through her relationships with Mary Meigs and with fellow organizers and writers, she modeled a politics grounded in companionship and accountability. Her "two hands" remain a touchstone for people trying to resist injustice while refusing to give up on human connection, a summation of the ethic that guided her writing and her life.
Our collection contains 21 quotes who is written by Barbara, under the main topics: Ethics & Morality - Justice - Freedom - Peace - Sister.