Facts about Erma Bombeck 
Summary
Erma Bombeck was a famous Journalist from USA, who lived between February 21, 1927 and April 22, 1996.
Biography
Was an American writer who in the second half of the 20th Century due to their humorous books and newspaper columns wide popularity reached.
Bombeck had three children and began at the age of 37 years to write about the ups and downs in the life of a housewife and mother. In the period from 1965 until her death in 1996, more than four thousand of her columns were published in about 800 newspapers, her last column she wrote six days before her death.
When Bombeck was a cyst kidney (Polycystic Kidney Disease) diagnosed. On 3 April 1996, her transplanted at a hospital in San Francisco a kidney. After she died, complications that occurred on 22 April. Bombeck was buried at Woodland Cemetery in Dayton, Ohio. Zodiac etc.
She is born under the zodiac pisces, who is known for Fluctuation, Depth, Imagination, Reactive, Indecisive.
Our collection contains 62 quotes who is written / told by Erma, under the main topics: Birthday, Car, Dreams, Food, Funny.
Here is some other popular authors who lived in the same timeframe: George Will, Khaleda Zia, Clive James, Joe Namath, Willie Mays, Mike Ditka, Didier Drogba, Øystein Stray Spetalen, Whitfield Diffie, Twyla Tharp, Jim Rohn, Rachel Corrie, Amy Lee, Robert Indiana, Slash, Amanda Peet, Shannon Hoon, Zhu Rongji, Joe Murray, Ednita Nazario
Famous quotes by Erma Bombeck (62)
"A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday"
"Dreams have only one owner at a time. That's why dreamers are lonely"
"Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving"
"A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat"
"Never have more children than you have car windows"
"Never go to your high school reunion pregnant or they will think that is all you have done since you graduated"
"For years my wedding ring has done its job. It has led me not into temptation. It has reminded my husband numerous times at parties that it's time to go home. It has been a source of relief to a dinner companion. It has been a status symbol in the maternity ward"
"Getting out of the hospital is a lot like resigning from a book club. You're not out of it until the computer says you're out of it"
"Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence"
"I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage"
"Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments"
"It goes without saying that you should never have more children than you have car windows"
"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'"
"Someone once threw me a small, brown, hairy kiwi fruit, and I threw a wastebasket over it until it was dead"
"Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery"
"If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead"
"When your mother asks, "Do you want a piece of advice?" it is a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get it anyway"
"When humor goes, there goes civilization"
"Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time"
"Why would anyone steal a shopping cart? It's like stealing a two-year-old"
"Some say our national pastime is baseball. Not me. It's gossip"
"Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It's too controversial"
"One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child's name and how old he or she is"
"How come anything you buy will go on sale next week?"
"Housework, if you do it right, will kill you"
"House guests should be regarded as perishables: Leave them out too long and they go bad"
"God created man, but I could do better"
"For some of us, watching a miniseries that lasts longer than most marriages is not easy"
"Do you know what you call those who use towels and never wash them, eat meals and never do the dishes, sit in rooms they never clean, and are entertained till they drop? If you have just answered, "A house guest," you're wrong because I have just described my kids"
"Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?"
"Children make your life important"
"Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you"
"Before you try to keep up with the Joneses, be sure they're not trying to keep up with you"
"All of us have moments in out lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them"
"A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend - and he's a priest"
"There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child"
"There is one thing I have never taught my body how to do and that is to figure out at 6 A.M. what it wants to eat at 6 P.M"
"There is nothing more miserable in the world than to arrive in paradise and look like your passport photo"
"There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt"
"The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again"
"Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago"
"Never order food in excess of your body weight"
"Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth"
"Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died"
"Never accept a drink from a urologist"
"My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?"
"My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint"
"My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car"
"Most women put off entertaining until the kids are grown"
"I will buy any creme, cosmetic, or elixir from a woman with a European accent"
"I was too old for a paper route, too young for Social Security and too tired for an affair"
"I was terrible at straight items. When I wrote obituaries, my mother said the only thing I ever got them to do was die in alphabetical order"
"I take a very practical view of raising children. I put a sign in each of their rooms: "Checkout Time is 18 years.""
"I never leaf through a copy of National Geographic without realizing how lucky we are to live in a society where it is traditional to wear clothes"
"I haven't trusted polls since I read that 62% of women had affairs during their lunch hour. I've never met a woman in my life who would give up lunch for sex"
"I have a theory about the human mind. A brain is a lot like a computer. It will only take so many facts, and then it will go on overload and blow up"
"I have a hat. It is graceful and feminine and give me a certain dignity, as if I were attending a state funeral or something. Someday I may get up enough courage to wear it, instead of carrying it"
"Humorists can never start to take themselves seriously. It's literary suicide"
"When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he's doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911"
"What's with you men? Would hair stop growing on your chest if you asked directions somewhere?"
"There's something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she's only measured water in it"
"Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other"
Comments
|
Age
Create Timeline Photo
More info