"A part of kindness consists in loving people more than they deserve"

Showing kindness often involves transcending the usual boundaries of merit and reciprocation, reaching beyond the calculation of what someone may or may not deserve. Joseph Joubert’s insight suggests that genuine kindness is, at its core, an act of grace. Rather than interacting with others based solely on their actions, worth, or behavior, true kindness arises when we choose to treat others with love that surpasses their perceived deservingness.

Frequently, social interactions are informed by an implicit tally of rights and wrongs, or the expectation that kindness should only be exchanged within the bounds of fairness and justice. Such a transactional approach, however, limits the transformative power of kindness. Loving people more than they seemingly deserve breaks this cycle. It introduces forgiveness and mercy, recognizing that all human beings are flawed and sometimes failing, yet still worthy of compassion.

By offering love that is greater than what is warranted by someone’s conduct, we open a space for connection, healing, and unexpected growth. This form of kindness disrupts a world sometimes dominated by strict judgment or conditional acceptance. It is not blind to faults or naïve about human nature, but is instead deeply aware of our common vulnerability. Extending extra love in this way nurtures a sense of hope and potential in others, reinforcing their dignity and providing the encouragement needed to change or to simply feel valued.

Such generosity enriches both the giver and the receiver, cultivating a gentler, more understanding community. While it may feel challenging to love others more than their actions merit, doing so can soften hearts, dissolve cycles of resentment, and inspire goodwill that extends beyond the original act. The wisdom embedded in this perspective lies in its recognition that the greatest kindness often emerges not when it is owed, but when it is least expected, and most needed.