"Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them?"
About this Quote
The rhetorical power comes from the question. “Am I not…?” isn’t a request for permission; it’s a trapdoor. It forces the listener to accept his premise or defend a more primitive satisfaction: punishment. Lincoln turns reconciliation into a form of strength, daring critics to admit they prefer enemies to peace. The elegance is that it flatters both camps at once: the hardliners get “destruction,” the moralists get “friends.”
Context matters. Lincoln is governing amid civil war and, later, the ugly politics of reunion. His project isn’t simply to win battles but to rebuild legitimacy across a fractured nation where yesterday’s rebels must become tomorrow’s citizens. The subtext is governing math: you can’t stitch a country together by collecting scalps; you need buy-in, institutions, and a future that even the defeated can live inside.
It’s also self-portraiture. Lincoln is signaling that his idealism has teeth. Compassion, in his hands, isn’t softness; it’s a method for removing threats more permanently than coercion can. The line makes reconciliation feel not only noble but unavoidable, the only kind of “destruction” that lasts.
Quote Details
| Topic | Friendship |
|---|---|
| Source | Later attribution: Future Poets (Rod Martin, 2011) modern compilation
Evidence: ... Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them? (Abraham Lincoln) The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time. (Abraham Lincoln) Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't ... Other candidates (2) Abraham Lincoln (Abraham Lincoln) compilation75.0% i not destroy my enemies when i make them my friends this is the power of redemp The Papers and Writings of Abraham Lincoln, Complete (Lincoln, Abraham, 1865) primary50.0% do not feel my own sorrows much more keenly than i do yours when i know of them |
| Cite |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Lincoln, Abraham. (2026, February 7). Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them? FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/am-i-not-destroying-my-enemies-when-i-make-24757/
Chicago Style
Lincoln, Abraham. "Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them?" FixQuotes. February 7, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/am-i-not-destroying-my-enemies-when-i-make-24757/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them?" FixQuotes, 7 Feb. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/am-i-not-destroying-my-enemies-when-i-make-24757/. Accessed 16 Feb. 2026.









