"Anger and hate against one we love steels our hearts, but contempt or pity leaves us silent and ashamed"
About this Quote
Contempt and pity, by contrast, are social poisons precisely because they don’t feel like a fight. They arrive with a hierarchy baked in. To pity someone you love is to quietly demote them; to feel contempt is to admit you’ve stopped taking them seriously. Those emotions don’t “steel” the heart; they hollow it out. Burroughs nails the aftermath: silence and shame. Not dramatic confrontation, not catharsis, but the queasy recognition that you’ve crossed into something uglier than hatred - a refusal to see the other person as an equal.
The subtext is almost tactical: if you’re trying to survive a relationship rupture, anger can be metabolized into boundaries and change. Contempt can’t. It’s the emotion you don’t post about because it indicts you, too. Coming from a writer who traded in high-adventure moral binaries, the line lands as an adult aside: the real villain isn’t conflict; it’s the moment you stop believing the other person deserves your voice.
Quote Details
| Topic | Love |
|---|---|
| Source | Help us find the source |
| Cite |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Burroghs, Edgar Rice. (2026, January 16). Anger and hate against one we love steels our hearts, but contempt or pity leaves us silent and ashamed. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/anger-and-hate-against-one-we-love-steels-our-132302/
Chicago Style
Burroghs, Edgar Rice. "Anger and hate against one we love steels our hearts, but contempt or pity leaves us silent and ashamed." FixQuotes. January 16, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/anger-and-hate-against-one-we-love-steels-our-132302/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"Anger and hate against one we love steels our hearts, but contempt or pity leaves us silent and ashamed." FixQuotes, 16 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/anger-and-hate-against-one-we-love-steels-our-132302/. Accessed 12 Feb. 2026.














