"Be aware that the more often a child hears the word no, the greater his need to say no himself"
About this Quote
The subtext is an indictment of reflexive, convenience-based discipline. It’s easy to reach for “no” because it’s efficient and emotionally satisfying; it ends the moment. But repeated “no” also teaches a child that negotiation is futile and that power is unilateral. When that’s the environment, the child’s “no” isn’t merely mimicry; it’s resistance training. Tempelsman implies that kids don’t just test limits for sport - they test them to locate themselves inside a relationship.
Contextually, the quote sits comfortably in late-20th/early-21st century child-development thinking that prizes autonomy, choice architecture, and collaborative language (“yes, and…” parenting, natural consequences, offering limited options). It’s not an argument against boundaries; it’s a critique of boundary-setting that’s all barricade and no bridge. The intent is practical: if you want cooperation, stop rehearsing opposition.
Quote Details
| Topic | Parenting |
|---|---|
| Source | Help us find the source |
| Cite |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Tempelsman, Cathy Rindner. (2026, January 17). Be aware that the more often a child hears the word no, the greater his need to say no himself. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/be-aware-that-the-more-often-a-child-hears-the-44359/
Chicago Style
Tempelsman, Cathy Rindner. "Be aware that the more often a child hears the word no, the greater his need to say no himself." FixQuotes. January 17, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/be-aware-that-the-more-often-a-child-hears-the-44359/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"Be aware that the more often a child hears the word no, the greater his need to say no himself." FixQuotes, 17 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/be-aware-that-the-more-often-a-child-hears-the-44359/. Accessed 16 Feb. 2026.
