Aging & Wisdom Quote by Merrill Markoe

Markoe’s warning lands because it’s less about fashion policing than about power dynamics dressed up as “just vibes.” The image is instantly legible: a man old enough to know better showing up in teenage cosplay, expecting the world (and his date) to play along. It’s funny because it’s specific - “skateboarding competition” is a perfect little jab - but the joke is doing moral work.

The intent is protective and conspiratorial, like advice whispered between friends after watching the same bad movie plot unfold: he’s not youthful, he’s performatively youthful. And that performance often signals a refusal to meet the moment with adult reciprocity. If you’re dressed for a nice restaurant and he’s dressed for a halfpipe, the mismatch isn’t aesthetic; it’s relational. It suggests he wants the benefits of adult intimacy without adult accountability. The clothes become shorthand for a bigger pattern: avoiding commitment, avoiding self-knowledge, avoiding the basic courtesy of taking your time seriously.

There’s also a cultural context baked in: late-20th-century/early-21st-century “cool” as a kind of currency men can keep spending long after it should’ve matured into something sturdier. Markoe’s cynicism isn’t anti-fun; it’s anti-illusion. She’s calling out the guy who treats age like a technicality and compatibility like an accessory, betting that a hoodie and sneakers can cancel out the responsibilities of being 35-plus. The punchline is that the costume doesn’t make him younger; it makes his intentions easier to read.