Success Quote by Aristotle Onassis

Onassis turns a supposedly sacred errand into a casting call: get me a priest who can communicate and doesn’t look like a scandal waiting to happen. The line lands because it treats religion the way a tycoon treats any service industry - useful, negotiable, and judged by presentation. “Understands English” isn’t a spiritual requirement; it’s a power requirement. In Onassis’ world, language is leverage, and English is the currency of international elites. A priest who can’t speak it can’t be controlled, can’t be audited, can’t be folded into the choreography of a high-stakes wedding, funeral, or public rite.

Then comes the dagger: “doesn’t look like Rasputin.” Rasputin is cultural shorthand for the unholy holy man - mystical, manipulative, sexually suspect, a figure who wormed his way into power through charisma and superstition. Onassis isn’t just asking for someone respectable; he’s policing the optics of belief. The jab implies that a priest’s authority is partly theatrical, and that the wrong face or vibe could turn a ceremony into tabloid fodder.

The context matters: Onassis moved through a postwar, jet-set world where old institutions (church, monarchy, legacy press) still mattered, but mostly as legitimizing backdrops for modern wealth. This line shows a man allergic to anything he can’t brand. It’s funny because it’s crassly practical; it’s revealing because it suggests he saw morality as a staffing problem, not a mystery.