"Friendship is a disinterested commerce between equals; love, an abject intercourse between tyrants and slaves"
About this Quote
Then he detonates the romance. Love becomes “abject intercourse,” language that drags sentiment down into the body and into humiliation. “Intercourse” still carries a broad meaning of interaction, but the sexual undertone is hard to miss; it’s part of the point. Where friendship is dignified exchange, love is messy contact, where people bargain with their self-respect.
The punchline is the power metaphor: “tyrants and slaves.” Goldsmith isn’t just being cynical; he’s diagnosing a social structure. In a culture organized around rank, patronage, and dependence, “love” easily mirrors the same vertical arrangements. Even when both parties consent, the emotional economy can flip into domination and submission: the more one needs, the less equal one becomes. The intent is corrective, almost anti-romantic: don’t confuse intensity for fairness. Goldsmith’s subtext is that the most modern, civilized bond isn’t the one that overwhelms you, but the one that leaves your dignity intact.
Quote Details
| Topic | Friendship |
|---|---|
| Source | Help us find the source |
| Cite |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Goldsmith, Oliver. (2026, January 15). Friendship is a disinterested commerce between equals; love, an abject intercourse between tyrants and slaves. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/friendship-is-a-disinterested-commerce-between-11098/
Chicago Style
Goldsmith, Oliver. "Friendship is a disinterested commerce between equals; love, an abject intercourse between tyrants and slaves." FixQuotes. January 15, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/friendship-is-a-disinterested-commerce-between-11098/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"Friendship is a disinterested commerce between equals; love, an abject intercourse between tyrants and slaves." FixQuotes, 15 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/friendship-is-a-disinterested-commerce-between-11098/. Accessed 12 Feb. 2026.











