"Have convictions. Be friendly. Stick to your beliefs as they stick to theirs. Work as hard as they do"
About this Quote
Conviction and friendliness rarely get offered in the same breath, which is exactly why Eleanor Roosevelt’s line lands: it’s a blueprint for power that refuses the usual trade-off between principle and social grace. Coming from a First Lady who treated the role as a platform rather than a parlor, the advice reads less like etiquette and more like strategy for surviving institutions built to soften you.
The key move is her symmetry: “as they stick to theirs,” “as hard as they do.” She’s not romanticizing moral purity; she’s acknowledging an arena where everyone already has beliefs and agendas, even when they call them “common sense” or “how things are done.” The subtext is pragmatic and faintly combative: you won’t win by being the only person pretending politics is just personal virtue. You win by matching the stamina and stubbornness of your opponents while keeping your humanity intact.
“Be friendly” isn’t a plea to be liked. It’s a recognition that influence often travels through relationships, and that righteous isolation is an indulgence. Roosevelt, who championed civil rights and reshaped the First Ladyship into a public-facing job (press conferences, columns, relentless travel), understood that moral authority is built through repetition, presence, and coalition-building - not one perfect speech.
Read in mid-century context, it’s also a coded instruction for women and outsiders: don’t wait for permission to be serious. Bring your convictions into the room, keep your tone steady, and outwork the gatekeepers.
The key move is her symmetry: “as they stick to theirs,” “as hard as they do.” She’s not romanticizing moral purity; she’s acknowledging an arena where everyone already has beliefs and agendas, even when they call them “common sense” or “how things are done.” The subtext is pragmatic and faintly combative: you won’t win by being the only person pretending politics is just personal virtue. You win by matching the stamina and stubbornness of your opponents while keeping your humanity intact.
“Be friendly” isn’t a plea to be liked. It’s a recognition that influence often travels through relationships, and that righteous isolation is an indulgence. Roosevelt, who championed civil rights and reshaped the First Ladyship into a public-facing job (press conferences, columns, relentless travel), understood that moral authority is built through repetition, presence, and coalition-building - not one perfect speech.
Read in mid-century context, it’s also a coded instruction for women and outsiders: don’t wait for permission to be serious. Bring your convictions into the room, keep your tone steady, and outwork the gatekeepers.
Quote Details
| Topic | Respect |
|---|
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