"Husbands are chiefly good as lovers when they are betraying their wives"
About this Quote
The phrasing does the work. “Chiefly good” turns affection into an audit. Love becomes a competency, and marriage becomes the setting where that competency is most likely to collapse. Then the twist: the husband is “good as” a lover precisely when he’s violating the role he’s supposed to play. It’s a bleak little economics of desire: risk raises value, secrecy sharpens attention, guilt poses as passion. The wife, pointedly, is reduced to the credential being betrayed, not a person in the room. That absence is the subtext - women are made into stakes in men’s dramas, not partners.
In Monroe’s era, the “good husband” was a postwar ideal sold in magazines, while infidelity was an open secret with uneven consequences. Her quote punctures that hypocrisy and exposes a cruel asymmetry: male excitement is romanticized when it’s predatory, while female pain is treated as collateral. It’s cynical, yes, but it’s also a warning from someone who watched romance turn into a performance art of betrayal.
Quote Details
| Topic | Husband & Wife |
|---|---|
| Source | Help us find the source |
| Cite | Cite this Quote |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Monroe, Marilyn. (2026, January 15). Husbands are chiefly good as lovers when they are betraying their wives. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/husbands-are-chiefly-good-as-lovers-when-they-are-24849/
Chicago Style
Monroe, Marilyn. "Husbands are chiefly good as lovers when they are betraying their wives." FixQuotes. January 15, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/husbands-are-chiefly-good-as-lovers-when-they-are-24849/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"Husbands are chiefly good as lovers when they are betraying their wives." FixQuotes, 15 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/husbands-are-chiefly-good-as-lovers-when-they-are-24849/. Accessed 4 Feb. 2026.








