"I am scared; I don't know what is going to happen to me. What was the point of working so hard and of being talented, to be rewarded like this? Never a penny, tormented all my life. It is horrible; one cannot imagine it"
About this Quote
The line "to be rewarded like this?" is acid. It frames her life as labor and merit, then exposes how those modern values collapse under patriarchy, family control, and the art world’s gatekeeping. Claudel’s career was repeatedly filtered through men - most notoriously Auguste Rodin - and her originality was easy to admire in retrospect, easier to ignore in real time. "Never a penny" isn’t a poetic flourish; it’s the material lever that makes vulnerability permanent. Poverty becomes a kind of soft imprisonment long before literal confinement.
When she says, "tormented all my life", the word "tormented" blurs mental anguish and social persecution: paranoia, isolation, the slow violence of being disbelieved. "It is horrible; one cannot imagine it" reads like a plea to pierce complacency. She’s asking for the one recognition she’s been denied: not praise, but belief - that the punishment is real, and undeserved.
Quote Details
| Topic | Fear |
|---|---|
| Source | Help us find the source |
| Cite |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Claudel, Camille. (2026, January 17). I am scared; I don't know what is going to happen to me. What was the point of working so hard and of being talented, to be rewarded like this? Never a penny, tormented all my life. It is horrible; one cannot imagine it. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/i-am-scared-i-dont-know-what-is-going-to-happen-77210/
Chicago Style
Claudel, Camille. "I am scared; I don't know what is going to happen to me. What was the point of working so hard and of being talented, to be rewarded like this? Never a penny, tormented all my life. It is horrible; one cannot imagine it." FixQuotes. January 17, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/i-am-scared-i-dont-know-what-is-going-to-happen-77210/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"I am scared; I don't know what is going to happen to me. What was the point of working so hard and of being talented, to be rewarded like this? Never a penny, tormented all my life. It is horrible; one cannot imagine it." FixQuotes, 17 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/i-am-scared-i-dont-know-what-is-going-to-happen-77210/. Accessed 5 Feb. 2026.



