"I sometimes wonder what would've happened if I'd entered the competition instead - I'd probably have come nowhere and given up on the whole fiction game"

In this quote by Paul Kane, the speaker reviews a hypothetical situation where they ponder the possibility of having entered a competition in the past. This reflection is tinged with insecurity and self-questioning, as the speaker thinks of that going into the competition may not have actually caused success ("I 'd most likely have come nowhere"). This belief recommends that the speaker harbors sensations of inadequacy or uncertainty in their own capabilities, particularly in the realm of fiction writing.

The phrase "quit on the whole fiction video game" shows that taking part in the competition-- and possibly stopping working-- could have resulted in complete disillusionment with pursuing fiction as a career or hobby. This aspect of the quote exposes the fragility and vulnerability fundamental in innovative ventures, where external validation, such as success in a competitors, can considerably impact one's self-confidence and sense of worth. It also highlights how innovative individuals typically view failure not simply as a setback, but as something that might deter them from their goals completely.

However, the statement is phrased through the lens of hindsight ("I often wonder what would've occurred"), showing that the speaker didn't really get in the competition. This suggests a path of durability or possibly a different opportunity taken that still led them to continue pursuing fiction in some capability. The self-questioning might suggest a development in self-awareness, acknowledging that their worry of failure might have stopped them, had they selected differently.

Ultimately, this quote underscores the complicated emotions involved in innovative pursuits, where insecurity and fear of failure are consistent companions. It reflects the concept that the courses not taken can lead us to wonder about alternate realities, yet likewise reminds us of the resilience needed to continue regardless of insecurities. The speaker seems to have actually found out significant lessons from this reflection, and those lessons might have positively influenced their journey in fiction writing.