"I'd always have grease in at least two places, in case the umpires would ask me to wipe one off. I never wanted to be caught out there with anything though, it wouldn't be professional"
About this Quote
The subtext is even better: he’s not confessing to doing something wrong, he’s confessing to doing it well. “I never wanted to be caught out there with anything though, it wouldn’t be professional” flips the ethical axis. Professionalism isn’t about fairness; it’s about competence under scrutiny. In Perry’s world, the real sin isn’t doctoring the ball - it’s being sloppy enough to get caught holding the bottle.
That posture fits the era and Perry’s particular legend. He pitched through baseball’s long gray zone where scuffing, spit, and “foreign substances” were policed inconsistently and, unofficially, tolerated as part of the cat-and-mouse theater between pitchers and umpires. Perry became the folk antihero of that theater, later leaning into it with a wink in his memoir. The quote works because it captures baseball’s old bargain: the sport wants its rules, but it also wants its rogues - as long as they’re smooth enough to keep the illusion intact.
Quote Details
| Topic | Sports |
|---|---|
| Source | Help us find the source |
| Cite | Cite this Quote |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Perry, Gaylord. (2026, January 16). I'd always have grease in at least two places, in case the umpires would ask me to wipe one off. I never wanted to be caught out there with anything though, it wouldn't be professional. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/id-always-have-grease-in-at-least-two-places-in-125080/
Chicago Style
Perry, Gaylord. "I'd always have grease in at least two places, in case the umpires would ask me to wipe one off. I never wanted to be caught out there with anything though, it wouldn't be professional." FixQuotes. January 16, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/id-always-have-grease-in-at-least-two-places-in-125080/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"I'd always have grease in at least two places, in case the umpires would ask me to wipe one off. I never wanted to be caught out there with anything though, it wouldn't be professional." FixQuotes, 16 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/id-always-have-grease-in-at-least-two-places-in-125080/. Accessed 4 Feb. 2026.





