"If I was a criminal, stationery stores and bakeries would be the two kinds of places I would concentrate on"
About this Quote
The specific intent feels less like plotting and more like self-revelation. Turturro isn’t confessing criminal instincts so much as admitting an appetite: for ritual, for texture, for small pleasures you can hold. Stationery is the fetish object of order and possibility - blank paper, sharp pencils, the promise of control. Bakeries are desire made public - warm carbs behind glass, comfort you can buy for a few dollars. If you were going to “rob” anything in modern life, why not the places that still offer a tactile antidote to digital sameness?
There’s subtext, too, about value. We’re trained to think theft follows money, yet he points to goods with low resale and high private meaning. That’s a sly critique of how we measure worth: the real score is emotional, not economic. Coming from an actor with a persona often tuned to nervous intensity and offbeat longing, it reads like character work in a sentence - a comic criminal defined not by violence, but by cravings for neatness and sweetness.
Quote Details
| Topic | Witty One-Liners |
|---|---|
| Source | Help us find the source |
| Cite |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Turturro, John. (2026, January 16). If I was a criminal, stationery stores and bakeries would be the two kinds of places I would concentrate on. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/if-i-was-a-criminal-stationery-stores-and-106989/
Chicago Style
Turturro, John. "If I was a criminal, stationery stores and bakeries would be the two kinds of places I would concentrate on." FixQuotes. January 16, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/if-i-was-a-criminal-stationery-stores-and-106989/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"If I was a criminal, stationery stores and bakeries would be the two kinds of places I would concentrate on." FixQuotes, 16 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/if-i-was-a-criminal-stationery-stores-and-106989/. Accessed 19 Feb. 2026.









