"In giving advice seek to help, not to please, your friend"
About this Quote
The subtext is almost accusatory. Pleasing a friend feels humane, even loyal, but it often means laundering their self-image, smoothing over the consequences of their choices, telling them what preserves the relationship rather than what preserves their future. Solon warns that this kind of kindness is counterfeit: it purchases short-term harmony at the price of long-term damage. Real help may look like disloyalty in the moment because it refuses the easy currency of approval.
Context matters. Solon was a lawgiver operating in a Athens riven by inequality, faction, and patronage; public decisions were routinely distorted by personal allegiance. In that world, the temptation to please wasn't just interpersonal weakness, it was political corrosion. The quote reads like a small rule meant to scale: train yourself to prize truth over favor with the people closest to you, and you build the muscle needed to resist flattering crowds, powerful families, and your own vanity. Friendship becomes a testing ground for integrity, and advice becomes a form of accountable speech rather than social performance.
Quote Details
| Topic | Friendship |
|---|---|
| Source | Help us find the source |
| Cite |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Solon. (2026, January 15). In giving advice seek to help, not to please, your friend. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/in-giving-advice-seek-to-help-not-to-please-your-33042/
Chicago Style
Solon. "In giving advice seek to help, not to please, your friend." FixQuotes. January 15, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/in-giving-advice-seek-to-help-not-to-please-your-33042/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"In giving advice seek to help, not to please, your friend." FixQuotes, 15 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/in-giving-advice-seek-to-help-not-to-please-your-33042/. Accessed 18 Feb. 2026.










