Marriage Quote by Joan Collins

Joan Collins lands this line with the kind of lacquered wit that only works if you can hear the clink of a cocktail glass behind it. On the surface, it’s a reject button for the old story that a husband is a woman’s default security system. Underneath, it’s a sharper diagnosis: men aren’t raised to do the invisible work that actually keeps a life running.

The punch comes from the bait-and-switch. “I don’t need a husband” sets up a familiar independence claim, but “What I need is a wife” flips the frame from romance to labor. She’s not longing for femininity; she’s naming a role. “Wife” here is shorthand for an entire logistical apparatus: remembering, planning, soothing, hosting, managing, anticipating. It’s funny because it’s blunt, and it’s blunt because it’s true enough to sting.

As an actress whose public image traded in glamour and marriages, Collins uses that very stereotype as leverage. The line functions like cultural judo: it takes the audience’s assumptions about her (diva, temptress, dependent) and throws them into a critique of domestic economics. There’s also a quiet class-aware edge: “looking after me” evokes the fantasy of being cared for, then punctures it by admitting care is usually outsourced onto women, paid or unpaid.

It’s not anti-men so much as anti-myth. The myth is that partnership naturally equals support. Collins suggests the support has always had a job title, and it’s rarely been “husband.”