"Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen"
About this Quote
The subtext is less self-help than indictment. Twain is pointing at the cruel timing of human development: we’re given our bodies before our judgment, our appetites before our knowledge, our confidence before our competence. By the time we’ve learned what matters, the clock has already started repossessing the body that could act on it. The line’s cynicism is tender, too; it admits that so much suffering is simply structural, baked into the sequence, not necessarily the individual’s moral failure.
Context matters: Twain wrote from the vantage of an older man in a rapidly modernizing America, skeptical of pieties about progress. Industrial time standardized life into stages; Twain’s quip refuses that neat narrative. It’s comedy as protest: if the calendar is going to be the real tyrant, at least let us imagine overthrowing it.
Quote Details
| Topic | Aging |
|---|---|
| Source | Later attribution: The Wit and Wisdom of Mark Twain (Alex Ayres, 2010) modern compilationISBN: 9780062010834 · ID: Ee_aQw6WfK8C
Evidence: ... Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen . -Phelps , Autobiography with Letters , 1939 , p . 965 AMBITION Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions ... Other candidates (1) Mark Twain (Mark Twain) compilation35.3% be much needed in the east only the scum of the population do it they and their children they and naturally and consi... |
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Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Twain, Mark. (2026, January 13). Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/life-would-be-infinitely-happier-if-we-could-only-22229/
Chicago Style
Twain, Mark. "Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen." FixQuotes. January 13, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/life-would-be-infinitely-happier-if-we-could-only-22229/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen." FixQuotes, 13 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/life-would-be-infinitely-happier-if-we-could-only-22229/. Accessed 12 Feb. 2026.








