"Like all my family and class, I considered it a sign of weakness to show affection; to have been caught kissing my mother would have been a disgrace, and to have shown affection for my father would have been a disaster"
About this Quote
Smedley’s intent is diagnostic, not merely autobiographical. As a journalist who moved through labor politics and revolutionary circles, she understood how private life trains people for public life. This is socialization as discipline: the body learns what can’t be shown long before the mind can argue it. The phrasing “caught kissing” matters; affection is framed as a punishable act, with surveillance implied. Even the self is split into performer and policeman.
The subtext is class anxiety. For families close to economic precarity or social judgment, softness reads as indulgence, a luxury that could invite ridicule or weaken resolve. By naming this emotional austerity so plainly, Smedley also hints at its cost: people raised to treat love as liability often become adults fluent in sacrifice, struggle, and ideology, but illiterate in comfort. The sentence is a miniature origin story for a life spent choosing causes over closeness.
Quote Details
| Topic | Family |
|---|---|
| Source | Daughter of Earth — Agnes Smedley (1929), autobiographical novel; contains the passage describing family/class attitudes toward showing affection (exact page varies by edition). |
| Cite |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Smedley, Agnes. (2026, January 16). Like all my family and class, I considered it a sign of weakness to show affection; to have been caught kissing my mother would have been a disgrace, and to have shown affection for my father would have been a disaster. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/like-all-my-family-and-class-i-considered-it-a-134041/
Chicago Style
Smedley, Agnes. "Like all my family and class, I considered it a sign of weakness to show affection; to have been caught kissing my mother would have been a disgrace, and to have shown affection for my father would have been a disaster." FixQuotes. January 16, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/like-all-my-family-and-class-i-considered-it-a-134041/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"Like all my family and class, I considered it a sign of weakness to show affection; to have been caught kissing my mother would have been a disgrace, and to have shown affection for my father would have been a disaster." FixQuotes, 16 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/like-all-my-family-and-class-i-considered-it-a-134041/. Accessed 21 Feb. 2026.
