Fatherhood Quote by Clifton Paul Fadiman

A certain kind of midcentury adult confidence radiates off Fadiman’s blunt arithmetic: 7 versus 54, a lifetime of accrued status stacked against a child’s raw need. The line isn’t about ego so much as about role clarity. He doesn’t sentimentalize childhood into wisdom, and he refuses the then-novel fashion of “buddy parenting,” where authority gets traded for constant friendliness. By declaring, almost shockingly, “I think I am better than he is,” he’s not inviting cruelty; he’s reclaiming the unfashionable idea that hierarchy can be an ethical instrument.

The intent is to defend boundaries. “Pal” is coded here as abdication: the adult shrinking to fit the child’s scale, swapping guidance for approval. Fadiman insists that fatherhood is not primarily an emotional vibe; it’s a duty with asymmetrical obligations. The subtext is anxiety about adult drift. If the parent’s main goal is to be liked, the child becomes the judge and the parent becomes a contestant. That inversion feels modern, even now.

The rhetoric works because it’s deliberately abrasive. He lists community respect, strength, intelligence - the adult world’s credentials - then uses them not to preen but to justify responsibility. It’s a rebuke to a culture that confuses warmth with sameness. He’s arguing that love can be expressed as structure, and that a child’s freedom depends, paradoxically, on an adult willing to be the unpopular one.