"She found me intolerable. But she got to know me, and I wore her down"
About this Quote
That’s the Parker subtext: relationships as tests of endurance, not revelations of compatibility. “She got to know me” sounds like intimacy, but it’s immediately undercut by “and I wore her down,” a phrase borrowed from interrogations, bad habits, and stone steps. The humor is in the shamelessness. It’s self-incriminating, then self-congratulatory, the voice of a narrator who wants credit for honesty while still enjoying the win.
Context matters because Parker’s world (think Spenser and the code-driven detective tradition) prizes persistence as a masculine virtue: keep showing up, keep taking hits, outlast the opposition. When that ethic gets rerouted into romance, it reveals an uncomfortable cultural logic: affection as something extracted over time, not freely given. The line works because it’s funny and vaguely sour at once, a one-liner that flatters the speaker’s grit while exposing the thin line between devotion and pressure. It’s not a love anthem; it’s a character tell.
Quote Details
| Topic | Romantic |
|---|---|
| Source | Help us find the source |
| Cite |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Parker, Robert B. (2026, January 16). She found me intolerable. But she got to know me, and I wore her down. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/she-found-me-intolerable-but-she-got-to-know-me-85905/
Chicago Style
Parker, Robert B. "She found me intolerable. But she got to know me, and I wore her down." FixQuotes. January 16, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/she-found-me-intolerable-but-she-got-to-know-me-85905/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"She found me intolerable. But she got to know me, and I wore her down." FixQuotes, 16 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/she-found-me-intolerable-but-she-got-to-know-me-85905/. Accessed 21 Feb. 2026.


