"Since Michael died I think I've worked constantly. Friends and colleagues are very sustaining. They're the people who get you through it... It's no good to be on your own"
About this Quote
Grief, in Judi Dench's telling, isn’t a grand soliloquy. It’s logistics: keep moving, keep working, stay among people. The line has the plainspoken quality of an actor who’s spent a lifetime making emotion legible without making it loud. “Since Michael died” lands like a stage direction - brisk, unadorned, refusing melodrama - and that restraint is the point. Dench isn’t aestheticizing loss; she’s describing the survival strategy that comes after the funeral casseroles are gone and the house is still quiet.
Work here is both refuge and risk. “I’ve worked constantly” can read as industriousness, but the subtext is avoidance: movement as anesthesia. In creative professions, constant work is socially sanctioned denial. You’re not “running from grief”; you’re “booked and busy.” Dench punctures that romantic myth by naming what actually holds her up: not the job, but the people around it. “Friends and colleagues are very sustaining” subtly elevates the backstage ecosystem - the crew, the familiar faces, the conversational scaffolding of rehearsal rooms - as a kind of informal care network.
The most revealing turn is her insistence on the collective: “They’re the people who get you through it.” She refuses the heroic narrative of private endurance. “It’s no good to be on your own” is almost aggressively unsentimental, a small rebuke to the British stoicism she’s often been cast to embody. The intent feels clear: permission. Not to “move on,” but to lean in, to accept company as medicine, and to treat loneliness not as dignity but as danger.
Work here is both refuge and risk. “I’ve worked constantly” can read as industriousness, but the subtext is avoidance: movement as anesthesia. In creative professions, constant work is socially sanctioned denial. You’re not “running from grief”; you’re “booked and busy.” Dench punctures that romantic myth by naming what actually holds her up: not the job, but the people around it. “Friends and colleagues are very sustaining” subtly elevates the backstage ecosystem - the crew, the familiar faces, the conversational scaffolding of rehearsal rooms - as a kind of informal care network.
The most revealing turn is her insistence on the collective: “They’re the people who get you through it.” She refuses the heroic narrative of private endurance. “It’s no good to be on your own” is almost aggressively unsentimental, a small rebuke to the British stoicism she’s often been cast to embody. The intent feels clear: permission. Not to “move on,” but to lean in, to accept company as medicine, and to treat loneliness not as dignity but as danger.
Quote Details
| Topic | Friendship |
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