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Life & Wisdom Quote by Edith Sitwell

"The aim of flattery is to soothe and encourage us by assuring us of the truth of an opinion we have already formed about ourselves"

About this Quote

Flattery, in Sitwell's telling, is less a gift than a delivery service: it brings you back your own self-image, neatly wrapped, with a signature required. The sting is in the precision. She refuses the sentimental idea that praise reveals something new; instead, it rehearses what you already believe about yourself, then seals it with social permission. Flattery works because it doesn’t argue. It confirms. It slides past skepticism by appealing to a private doctrine you’ve been quietly preaching all along.

The subtext is about power. If the flatterer can accurately guess your preferred story about yourself, they’ve gained access to your softest political territory: vanity disguised as identity. Sitwell’s “soothe and encourage” sounds benevolent, but it’s also clinical, like describing a sedative. The reassurance isn’t aimed at truth; it’s aimed at comfort. That’s why flattery can feel oddly intimate even when it’s transactional: it mirrors your internal monologue with better lighting.

Context matters here. Sitwell came up in a British literary world thick with class performance, salon talk, and reputations treated like currency. As a poet associated with modernist spectacle and social scrutiny, she knew how much artistic standing depended on circles of approval - and how quickly “admiration” could curdle into a technique. Read now, the line lands like an early field guide to the algorithmic era: the most effective praise doesn’t challenge you, it targets the brand you’re already trying to be. Flattery becomes less about seeing you than about agreeing with you, loudly, at the exact moment you’re most prepared to believe it.

Quote Details

TopicTruth
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Citation Formats

APA Style (7th ed.)
Sitwell, Edith. (2026, January 18). The aim of flattery is to soothe and encourage us by assuring us of the truth of an opinion we have already formed about ourselves. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/the-aim-of-flattery-is-to-soothe-and-encourage-us-8455/

Chicago Style
Sitwell, Edith. "The aim of flattery is to soothe and encourage us by assuring us of the truth of an opinion we have already formed about ourselves." FixQuotes. January 18, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/the-aim-of-flattery-is-to-soothe-and-encourage-us-8455/.

MLA Style (9th ed.)
"The aim of flattery is to soothe and encourage us by assuring us of the truth of an opinion we have already formed about ourselves." FixQuotes, 18 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/the-aim-of-flattery-is-to-soothe-and-encourage-us-8455/. Accessed 5 Feb. 2026.

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About the Author

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Edith Sitwell (September 7, 1887 - December 9, 1964) was a Poet from United Kingdom.

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