Time & Perspective Quote by Dave Barry

Live human sacrifice is cartoonishly extreme, which is exactly the point: Barry is diagnosing a civic numbness so advanced that even the most grotesque breach of norms would barely register. The joke isn’t just that politics is a circus; it’s that the audience has stopped looking up from the popcorn. By choosing “major parties,” he spreads the indictment evenly, refusing the comforting fantasy that only the other side is corrupt or absurd. Cynicism becomes bipartisan infrastructure.

The mechanics matter. “Could conduct” is hypothetical, almost casual, as if the barrier to atrocity is merely scheduling. “On their podiums” drags the violence onto the sacred stage of democracy, where rhetoric is supposed to substitute for blood. Then “during prime time” lands the satirical dagger: this isn’t about policy failure so much as media logic. Prime time is where meaning is manufactured, where spectacle is rewarded with attention and attention becomes its own moral alibi. If something can be packaged as content, it can be tolerated.

“I doubt that anybody would notice” is the bleakest part, because it isn’t claiming people would approve; it’s saying they’d be anesthetized. Barry’s humor runs on exaggeration, but the subtext is realist: outrage is finite, distraction is infinite, and scandal competes with sports scores and commercials. The line anticipates a politics where norms erode not in one dramatic collapse, but through a million tiny shrugs, until even the unimaginable feels like just another segment before the weather.