"The mark of a good marriage is partnership and continuing to feel inspired by your spouse. I had that with Tao. But the end is not necessarily the tragedy. Staying in a relationship that is no longer working is the tragedy. Living unhappily - that's the tragedy"
About this Quote
The subtext is a reframing of female desire and agency that still reads as mildly radical in mainstream culture. She’s not asking for permission to leave; she’s arguing that staying can be the more ethically dubious choice, especially when the relationship has become a performance for appearances, children, or public narrative. The repeated “tragedy” does rhetorical work: it relocates moral gravity away from divorce (the culturally stigmatized event) and onto prolonged unhappiness (the normalized one). That’s a sharp inversion of what people are trained to mourn.
Context matters because Wilde is speaking as a public figure whose private life is routinely treated as public property. By defining “good marriage” in emotional terms rather than longevity, she preempts the voyeuristic scoreboard of who “won” the breakup. Naming Tao specifically keeps it human, not abstract: it signals respect for what existed while insisting that respect doesn’t require endurance. The most persuasive part is the plainness of it - no empowerment slogan, no bitterness - just a pragmatic insistence that endings can be honest, and that honesty beats martyrdom.
Quote Details
| Topic | Marriage |
|---|---|
| Source | Help us find the source |
| Cite |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Wilde, Olivia. (2026, January 15). The mark of a good marriage is partnership and continuing to feel inspired by your spouse. I had that with Tao. But the end is not necessarily the tragedy. Staying in a relationship that is no longer working is the tragedy. Living unhappily - that's the tragedy. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/the-mark-of-a-good-marriage-is-partnership-and-166359/
Chicago Style
Wilde, Olivia. "The mark of a good marriage is partnership and continuing to feel inspired by your spouse. I had that with Tao. But the end is not necessarily the tragedy. Staying in a relationship that is no longer working is the tragedy. Living unhappily - that's the tragedy." FixQuotes. January 15, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/the-mark-of-a-good-marriage-is-partnership-and-166359/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"The mark of a good marriage is partnership and continuing to feel inspired by your spouse. I had that with Tao. But the end is not necessarily the tragedy. Staying in a relationship that is no longer working is the tragedy. Living unhappily - that's the tragedy." FixQuotes, 15 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/the-mark-of-a-good-marriage-is-partnership-and-166359/. Accessed 7 Feb. 2026.









