"The only sexual act that is sinful is the one that uses or abuses"
About this Quote
Buckley’s line tries to relocate “sin” from the bedroom to the moral ledger: not desire itself, but the turn where desire treats another person as a tool. It’s a strategic reframing, and it works because it speaks in the Church’s native language (sin, act, abuse) while quietly swapping out its usual focus (rule-breaking) for something closer to consent and dignity.
The phrasing is doing careful political work. “The only” is an aggressive narrowing move, meant to shut down the endless casuistry that has historically policed which bodies may touch and how. By making harm the sole criterion, Buckley implicitly sidelines a long tradition of condemning sex based on gender roles, marital status, or orientation. That’s not just pastoral sensitivity; it’s an attempt to redraw the boundaries of sexual ethics without announcing a revolution.
“Uses or abuses” is the hinge. “Abuse” names obvious coercion; “use” is sharper, because it captures the everyday instrumentalization that people excuse as normal: pressure, manipulation, transactional affection, or treating consent as a technicality. The subtext is that the real scandal isn’t pleasure, it’s dehumanization. That’s a modern ethical claim smuggled into a traditional moral framework.
Context matters: as a clergyman, Buckley is speaking into a Church shaped by sexual scandal and public mistrust. The line reads like a corrective to moral hypocrisy: stop obsessing over private acts while ignoring power. It’s also a bid to regain credibility by anchoring sexual teaching in a principle most people recognize immediately: don’t turn intimacy into exploitation.
The phrasing is doing careful political work. “The only” is an aggressive narrowing move, meant to shut down the endless casuistry that has historically policed which bodies may touch and how. By making harm the sole criterion, Buckley implicitly sidelines a long tradition of condemning sex based on gender roles, marital status, or orientation. That’s not just pastoral sensitivity; it’s an attempt to redraw the boundaries of sexual ethics without announcing a revolution.
“Uses or abuses” is the hinge. “Abuse” names obvious coercion; “use” is sharper, because it captures the everyday instrumentalization that people excuse as normal: pressure, manipulation, transactional affection, or treating consent as a technicality. The subtext is that the real scandal isn’t pleasure, it’s dehumanization. That’s a modern ethical claim smuggled into a traditional moral framework.
Context matters: as a clergyman, Buckley is speaking into a Church shaped by sexual scandal and public mistrust. The line reads like a corrective to moral hypocrisy: stop obsessing over private acts while ignoring power. It’s also a bid to regain credibility by anchoring sexual teaching in a principle most people recognize immediately: don’t turn intimacy into exploitation.
Quote Details
| Topic | Ethics & Morality |
|---|---|
| Source | Help us find the source |
More Quotes by Pat
Add to List





