"The opposite of courage in our society is not cowardice, it is conformity"
About this Quote
Courage, Rollo May suggests, isn’t mainly a private duel with fear. It’s a public refusal to be smoothed down. By naming conformity - not cowardice - as courage’s true opposite, he targets the quieter, more socially rewarded form of surrender: the decision to disappear into the crowd and call it “being realistic.” Cowardice at least admits a threat. Conformity pretends there is no threat at all, only “the way things are.”
May’s background in existential psychology matters here. Writing in a 20th-century America shaped by mass media, corporate life, Cold War anxieties, and a rising therapeutic culture, he watched individuality get reframed as pathology: don’t make a fuss, don’t stand out, don’t risk rejection. The line exposes how social systems outsource moral choice. You don’t have to silence dissent with force if you can teach people to self-censor in exchange for belonging.
The subtext is accusatory but practical: most of us aren’t defeated by villains; we’re absorbed by norms. Conformity is seductive precisely because it feels like safety, even virtue - politeness, professionalism, “team player.” May is pushing against the myth that courage is a rare heroic act. In modern life, it’s often smaller and more expensive: saying the unpopular thing at work, resisting the algorithmic pull of consensus, choosing an identity that won’t be easily approved. Courage becomes less about bravado than about tolerating social friction without flinching.
May’s background in existential psychology matters here. Writing in a 20th-century America shaped by mass media, corporate life, Cold War anxieties, and a rising therapeutic culture, he watched individuality get reframed as pathology: don’t make a fuss, don’t stand out, don’t risk rejection. The line exposes how social systems outsource moral choice. You don’t have to silence dissent with force if you can teach people to self-censor in exchange for belonging.
The subtext is accusatory but practical: most of us aren’t defeated by villains; we’re absorbed by norms. Conformity is seductive precisely because it feels like safety, even virtue - politeness, professionalism, “team player.” May is pushing against the myth that courage is a rare heroic act. In modern life, it’s often smaller and more expensive: saying the unpopular thing at work, resisting the algorithmic pull of consensus, choosing an identity that won’t be easily approved. Courage becomes less about bravado than about tolerating social friction without flinching.
Quote Details
| Topic | Ethics & Morality |
|---|---|
| Source | Rollo May — The Courage to Create (1975). Often cited line: "The opposite of courage in our society is not cowardice, it is conformity." |
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