Wit & Attitude Quote by Cathy Rindner Tempelsman

Tempelsman is doing something sly: she takes a behavior we love to label and punish - lying - and reframes it as a messy mix of impulse, self-protection, and the hunger to be seen as “good.” The line doesn’t excuse the cookie theft so much as it indicts the adult urge to turn a toddler’s panic into a character verdict. Calling a three-year-old a “liar” is really about adult certainty: we want a clean moral category because it makes discipline feel justified and emotionally tidy.

The psychological pivot is in “convinces himself of a new truth.” That’s not courtroom perjury; it’s the way small kids (and plenty of adults) edit reality in real time to reduce shame. The child’s story isn’t a calculated con; it’s a coping mechanism that becomes, in his mind, a version of events he can live inside. Tempelsman’s subtext is that “truth” often bends under social pressure long before it bends under malice.

“Eager for your approval” is the quiet gut-punch. The kid isn’t trying to beat you; he’s trying to belong with you. The lie is relational, not criminal: a bid to restore closeness after a rupture. The context here is modern parenting culture’s tug-of-war between accountability and empathy, and her intent is clear: replace moral panic with developmental literacy. Don’t train a toddler to fear your reaction; train him to trust that honesty won’t cost him love.