"To know a man, observe how he wins his object, rather than how he loses it; for when we fail, our pride supports us - when we succeed, it betrays us"
About this Quote
Colton’s phrasing turns on a neat reversal. We usually treat failure as character’s crucible and success as its reward. He flips that moral logic: defeat is where people perform virtues; triumph is where they leak their vices. The subtext is unflattering and shrewdly social. Don’t judge someone by their heartbreak montage; watch their victory lap. Who do they thank? Who do they ignore? Do they become generous, or do they become entitled? The “object” matters less than the method: the tactics, the collateral damage, the appetite for domination dressed up as ambition.
The context fits Colton’s era: a Britain of rising bourgeois competition, patronage networks, and public moralizing, where reputation was both currency and theater. As an aphorist, he’s not building a system; he’s sharpening a blade. It’s advice disguised as cynicism: if you want to know someone’s ethics, don’t audit their excuses. Audit their celebrations.
Quote Details
| Topic | Wisdom |
|---|---|
| Source | Help us find the source |
| Cite |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Colton, Charles Caleb. (2026, January 15). To know a man, observe how he wins his object, rather than how he loses it; for when we fail, our pride supports us - when we succeed, it betrays us. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/to-know-a-man-observe-how-he-wins-his-object-76098/
Chicago Style
Colton, Charles Caleb. "To know a man, observe how he wins his object, rather than how he loses it; for when we fail, our pride supports us - when we succeed, it betrays us." FixQuotes. January 15, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/to-know-a-man-observe-how-he-wins-his-object-76098/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"To know a man, observe how he wins his object, rather than how he loses it; for when we fail, our pride supports us - when we succeed, it betrays us." FixQuotes, 15 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/to-know-a-man-observe-how-he-wins-his-object-76098/. Accessed 21 Feb. 2026.












