Skip to main content

Love Quote by Oscar Wilde

"To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance"

About this Quote

Wilde makes self-love sound like scandalous gossip, which is exactly the point. “The beginning of a lifelong romance” turns what Victorian morality treated as a private duty (self-respect, self-discipline, the sober Protestant inventory of one’s soul) into something flirtatious, aesthetic, and faintly improper. He doesn’t say self-love is healthy or necessary; he says it’s romantic. That’s Wilde’s signature maneuver: smuggling a critique of social virtue inside a line that purrs.

The intent is double-edged. On its face, it’s a bright prescription for confidence. Underneath, it’s an attack on the culture that demands self-erasure in the name of respectability. Wilde lived in a world where appearances were policed, desire was dangerous, and sincerity was often a performance. To call self-love a “romance” suggests you should treat your own life with the same attention you’d lavish on a lover: curiosity, tenderness, even indulgence. It’s a rebuke to the idea that worth must be conferred from outside - by class, by marriage, by applause.

The subtext carries Wilde’s irony, too. Romance is dramatic; it’s prone to self-deception. Loving oneself can be liberation, but it can also slide into narcissism, the very vice polite society loves to condemn while quietly practicing. Wilde frames the self as both beloved and author: if you must live in a theater of judgment, at least write yourself as the central character rather than the understudy.

Quote Details

TopicSelf-Love
Source
Rejected source: The Happy Prince: And Other Tales (Oscar Wilde, George Percy Jacomb Hood, 1888)IA: happyprinceando00hoodgoog
Text match: 50.00%   Provider: Internet Archive
Evidence:
ows on the hill yet love is better than life and what is the heart of a bird com
Other candidates (2)
Oscar Wilde (Oscar Wilde) compilation98.0%
erything to love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance one should alway
A Companion to the Works of Thomas Mann (Herbert Lehnert, Eva Wessell, 2004) compilation90.0%
... Oscar Wilde. By quoting from memory, he changed a bon mot from one of Wilde's plays. Wilde's original wording has...
Cite

Citation Formats

APA Style (7th ed.)
Wilde, Oscar. (2026, January 13). To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/to-love-oneself-is-the-beginning-of-a-lifelong-34299/

Chicago Style
Wilde, Oscar. "To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance." FixQuotes. January 13, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/to-love-oneself-is-the-beginning-of-a-lifelong-34299/.

MLA Style (9th ed.)
"To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance." FixQuotes, 13 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/to-love-oneself-is-the-beginning-of-a-lifelong-34299/. Accessed 6 Feb. 2026.

More Quotes by Oscar Add to List
To Love Oneself is the Beginning of a Lifelong Romance
Click to enlarge Portrait | Landscape

About the Author

Oscar Wilde

Oscar Wilde (October 16, 1854 - November 30, 1900) was a Dramatist from Ireland.

166 more quotes available

View Profile

Similar Quotes

Anthony Powell, Novelist
Anthony Powell