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Love Quote by Stephen Chbosky

"We accept the love we think we deserve"

About this Quote

A line like this lands because it sounds like comfort while quietly indicting you. Chbosky’s phrasing turns love into a mirror held at chest height: not a prize handed out by fate, but a relationship you tacitly negotiate based on your self-concept. The verb "accept" matters. It implies an offer on the table, something you could refuse, but often don’t. It also shifts agency onto the receiver, where most romance narratives prefer to keep it safely on the giver. You’re not just "treated" badly; you’re recruited into the logic that makes that treatment feel normal.

The subtext is psychological, almost clinical, yet packaged as teen-lit wisdom. "Think" is the trapdoor: deserving isn’t an objective moral ledger, it’s a belief system. People stay in crooked dynamics not because they’re irrational, but because the arrangement harmonizes with old internal stories - shame, scarcity, the suspicion that wanting more is arrogant. The quote is brutally portable: it works for romance, friendship, even family, because it’s really about boundaries and self-worth masquerading as destiny.

In the context of Chbosky’s work (and the broader 1990s/early-2000s coming-of-age sensibility), it’s a thesis statement for adolescent emotional education: learning that your taste in love can be a symptom. It flatters the reader with insight, then dares them to do the hard part - revise what they "think" they deserve, and watch their standards stop feeling like a fantasy.

Quote Details

TopicSelf-Love
Source
Unverified source: The Perks of Being a Wallflower (Stephen Chbosky, 1999)
Text match: 85.00%   Provider: Cross-Reference
Evidence:
Page 24 (in many editions; early in Part 1). Primary/original appearance is in Stephen Chbosky’s novel. The line is spoken by Bill to Charlie as: “Charlie, we accept the love we think we deserve.” Many secondary study/quote references (e.g., SparkNotes, LitCharts) also place it on p. 24, but page...
Other candidates (2)
The Perks of Being a Wallflower (Stephen Chbosky) compilation95.0%
in life is that bad yes p24 charlie we accept the love we think we deserve p24
You deserve the best kind of love. Have this journal or notebook as a reminder of that as you record notes or thought...
FeaturedThis quote was our Quote of the Day on October 12, 2023
Cite

Citation Formats

APA Style (7th ed.)
Chbosky, Stephen. (2026, January 11). We accept the love we think we deserve. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/we-accept-the-love-we-think-we-deserve-172998/

Chicago Style
Chbosky, Stephen. "We accept the love we think we deserve." FixQuotes. January 11, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/we-accept-the-love-we-think-we-deserve-172998/.

MLA Style (9th ed.)
"We accept the love we think we deserve." FixQuotes, 11 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/we-accept-the-love-we-think-we-deserve-172998/. Accessed 12 Feb. 2026.

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About the Author

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Stephen Chbosky (born January 24, 1970) is a Novelist from USA.

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