"We have been very conditioned by the cultures that we come from and are usually very identified with the particular gender that we happen to be a member of"
About this Quote
Cohen’s line is doing a quiet bit of rhetorical judo: it sounds descriptive, even gentle, but it smuggles in a challenge to the listener’s sense of self. “Very conditioned” frames identity less as an inner truth than as training - the accumulated habits a culture installs before you’re old enough to consent. And “usually very identified” adds a second twist: it’s not just that gender roles are taught; it’s that we cling to them, mistaking familiarity for essence.
The phrase “that we happen to be a member of” is the tell. “Happen” drains gender of destiny. It’s a soft word with hard implications, suggesting contingency where people often insist on inevitability. Cohen is also careful to say “cultures” plural, which widens the critique beyond any single society and invites the reader to see gender not as a stable global script but as a set of local customs with different uniforms.
As a writer associated with spirituality and self-inquiry, Cohen’s likely intent isn’t only political commentary; it’s diagnostic. He’s pointing at identification itself as the trap: the mind latching onto “male” or “female” as a primary badge, then organizing desire, fear, and status around it. The subtext is an invitation to dis-identify - not necessarily to reject gender, but to loosen its grip so it stops functioning like a personality.
Contextually, the quote sits comfortably in late-20th/early-21st century discourse where gender becomes legible as social construction, while also reflecting a spiritual vocabulary that treats identity as something you can witness, not just perform.
The phrase “that we happen to be a member of” is the tell. “Happen” drains gender of destiny. It’s a soft word with hard implications, suggesting contingency where people often insist on inevitability. Cohen is also careful to say “cultures” plural, which widens the critique beyond any single society and invites the reader to see gender not as a stable global script but as a set of local customs with different uniforms.
As a writer associated with spirituality and self-inquiry, Cohen’s likely intent isn’t only political commentary; it’s diagnostic. He’s pointing at identification itself as the trap: the mind latching onto “male” or “female” as a primary badge, then organizing desire, fear, and status around it. The subtext is an invitation to dis-identify - not necessarily to reject gender, but to loosen its grip so it stops functioning like a personality.
Contextually, the quote sits comfortably in late-20th/early-21st century discourse where gender becomes legible as social construction, while also reflecting a spiritual vocabulary that treats identity as something you can witness, not just perform.
Quote Details
| Topic | Equality |
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