"Well, softness and femininity like yours people don't expect of me; so when they find me emotional and capable of real vulnerability, they're surprised"
About this Quote
The intent isn’t just confession; it’s a critique of expectation. She’s describing an audience trained to mistake toughness for emotional absence, and femininity for emotional availability. When she says “people don’t expect of me,” she’s really saying: they’ve outsourced their understanding of me to a type. The subtext is fatigue with being misread, but also a sly awareness of how misreading can function as armor. If they don’t expect softness, they can’t demand it, exploit it, or punish it on schedule.
“Real vulnerability” does a lot of work: it implies there’s a fake version people accept (the performative tear, the acceptable confession), and then there’s the kind that costs something. The surprise she describes isn’t flattering; it’s diagnostic. It reveals how narrow the cultural script is for women who don’t perform sweetness on cue - and how quickly we turn complexity into a plot twist.
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Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Dunaway, Faye. (n.d.). Well, softness and femininity like yours people don't expect of me; so when they find me emotional and capable of real vulnerability, they're surprised. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/well-softness-and-femininity-like-yours-people-146006/
Chicago Style
Dunaway, Faye. "Well, softness and femininity like yours people don't expect of me; so when they find me emotional and capable of real vulnerability, they're surprised." FixQuotes. Accessed February 2, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/well-softness-and-femininity-like-yours-people-146006/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"Well, softness and femininity like yours people don't expect of me; so when they find me emotional and capable of real vulnerability, they're surprised." FixQuotes, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/well-softness-and-femininity-like-yours-people-146006/. Accessed 2 Feb. 2026.






