"When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself"
About this Quote
The intent is corrective and disarming. Dyer isn't just advising people to be nicer; he's trying to puncture the false authority that comes with condemning others. Judgment is presented as a kind of identity performance: when we call someone "lazy" or "selfish", we're often defending a private standard we need to believe in, or projecting a trait we can't tolerate in ourselves. The subtext is that criticism can be a form of self-protection, a way to keep the world legible by sorting it into categories that flatter our self-image.
Context matters here. Dyer sits in that late-20th-century self-help lineage that blends pop psychology with spiritual individualism. In that world, inner life is not only real but decisive; change starts with your perceptions, not someone else's behavior. That can sound like a dodge of accountability, but the quote is sharper than mere positivity: it treats judgment as evidence. The sting is that it doesn't let the judge off the hook. It asks: what does your harshness reveal about you?
Quote Details
| Topic | Wisdom |
|---|---|
| Source | Help us find the source |
| Cite |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Dyer, Wayne. (2026, January 17). When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/when-you-judge-another-you-do-not-define-them-you-36825/
Chicago Style
Dyer, Wayne. "When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself." FixQuotes. January 17, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/when-you-judge-another-you-do-not-define-them-you-36825/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself." FixQuotes, 17 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/when-you-judge-another-you-do-not-define-them-you-36825/. Accessed 18 Feb. 2026.









