Book: Communication, Sex, and Money

Overview
Edwin Louis Cole’s 1995 book “Communication, Sex, and Money” distills the pressures that most often make or break relationships into three arenas where character is tested and trust is built. Writing from a conservative Christian perspective and drawing heavily on Scripture, Cole argues that healthy lives, marriages, and communities are forged when men and women master their words, govern their sexuality, and steward their resources under God’s authority. The book blends biblical teaching with direct, memorable maxims, challenging readers to grow up, accept responsibility, and align personal habits with covenant commitments.

Communication
Cole frames communication as the lifeblood of relationship and leadership. Words reveal character, he says; tone and timing disclose intent; listening is an act of love. He urges truth spoken in love rather than manipulation or avoidance, stressing that secrecy and half-truths erode trust faster than mistakes confessed and forgiven. Practical counsel centers on clarity and responsibility: address issues promptly, attack problems not people, seek understanding before defending a position, and keep short accounts through confession and reconciliation. For Cole, communication is not merely technique but moral discipline, speech that serves another’s good evidences maturity, while careless words advertise immaturity and pride.

Sex
Sexuality is treated as a sacred gift that becomes constructive only within covenant fidelity. Cole distinguishes love from lust, portraying lust as self-serving desire that consumes, and love as self-giving commitment that builds. He warns that private compromises, fantasy, pornography, flirtation, eventually surface in public consequences, damaging identity and trust. The path of integrity is purity before marriage and faithfulness within marriage, pursued not through shame but through a renewed mind and disciplined habits. Intimacy, he argues, grows where security, honesty, and mutual honor are maintained; it withers where selfishness or secrecy reign. Throughout, he calls men in particular to bear responsibility as servant-leaders who protect, provide, and model restraint.

Money
On money, Cole teaches stewardship over ownership. Finances test priorities, reveal loyalties, and easily become a counterfeit master. He commends diligence, budgeting, and generosity, warning against impulsive debt, get-rich schemes, and the anxiety produced by living beyond one’s means. Prosperity is framed as provision with a purpose, resources entrusted by God to be managed for family, church, and community. Gratitude and contentment become safeguards, while tithing and benevolence train the heart against greed. As with speech and sex, the point is character: money in the hand is a tool; money in the heart is an idol.

Character and Covenant
The book ties the three arenas to a single thesis: crises of communication, sex, and money are usually crises of character. Cole’s recurring theme that manhood and Christlikeness are synonymous undergirds his counsel, pressing readers to embrace responsibility rather than excuse it. He frames marriage as covenant, not contract, and urges couples to repair breaches with repentance and forgiveness, not scorekeeping. Spiritual disciplines, prayer, Scripture, accountability in community, supply the power to change habits, while consistent small choices create momentum that outlasts motivational highs.

Style and Aim
Cole writes tersely, with aphorisms and real-life anecdotes that confront and encourage. The tone is pastoral yet blunt, aimed especially at men but applicable to women and leaders in any sphere. By reducing complexity to three interlocking domains and rooting practice in biblical conviction, the book offers a roadmap for stability and growth: guard your tongue, govern your desires, and guide your finances, and you will build trust that can carry a marriage, a family, and a life.