"I don't let people use me. That's why I like a small number of people in my life. The more people in my life, the more complex it becomes, so I just try to keep it at a minimum"

A declaration of boundaries and self-respect stands at the center: refusing to be used is a clear assertion that access to one’s time, energy, and compassion must be earned. Choosing a small circle becomes less about exclusion and more about stewardship, guarding finite resources so they can be invested where trust and reciprocity are real.

Fewer relationships can mean deeper ones. With a limited number of people, expectations are clearer, accountability is stronger, and emotional bandwidth isn’t diluted by constant maintenance of weak ties. The social math is simple: each new connection introduces new loyalties, demands, and potential conflicts. As the web grows, so does complexity, misunderstandings multiply, priorities clash, and there’s less space for stillness or self-reflection. Trimming the network is thus a strategy for clarity.

There’s also a quiet confidence in the stance of not letting others use you. It frames care as a choice, not an obligation. Saying no becomes an act of integrity: a refusal to be reduced to a resource for others’ convenience. This posture invites mutuality, people who remain in the inner circle are those who show up with respect, consistency, and honest intent.

The approach isn’t misanthropy; it’s curation. Boundaries here function like a gate, not a wall: permeable to those who align with one’s values, firm against manipulation or entitlement. Solitude and selectivity create a safer space for vulnerability, creativity, and rest. They also make room for the slow work of trust, which is hard to do at scale.

There are trade-offs. A smaller circle can mean fewer opportunities and perspectives. Yet the choice prioritizes depth over breadth, stability over noise. It is a reminder that attention is a precious currency, and that a life designed around meaningful bonds, rather than sheer volume of connections, offers both protection and freedom.