"I have a theory that the secret of marital happiness is simple: drink in different pubs to your other half"
- Jilly Cooper
About this Quote
In this quote, Jilly Cooper humorously suggests that a person key to a successful marital relationship is maintaining a degree of uniqueness and self-reliance within the relationship. The suggestion to "drink in various pubs" represents the idea that partners need to have separate interests and personal areas where they can loosen up and recharge independently of each other.
The concept here is not about promoting physical separation however rather encouraging emotional and social autonomy. In a marital context, excessive togetherness can often lead to feelings of suffocation or loss of personal identity. By participating in separate activities, each partner has the chance to grow individually, which can bring fresh viewpoints and experiences back into the relationship. This newly found development can promote a vibrant and evolving collaboration where both people feel valued not only as part of a couple but also as independent beings.
Moreover, the lively tone of the quote reflects the importance of humor and lightheartedness in marital relationship. Cooper, known for her amusing writing, highlights that marriage doesn't have to be a serious, all-consuming dedication where partners do whatever together. Rather, it can be a balanced relationship where partners take pleasure in both shared experiences and specific pursuits.
Furthermore, by hanging around in different social environments, partners can cultivate diverse relationships and widen their social media networks. This diversity can enhance their understanding and appreciation of each other's individuality, therefore enhancing the marital bond.
In summary, Jilly Cooper's quote suggests that the "secret" to marital happiness depends on recognizing and appreciating each other's uniqueness. By preserving different interests and having personal areas-- even if it's simply taking pleasure in a drink at a different club-- couples can support both independence and intimacy, leading to a more satisfying and harmonious partnership.
"The man who makes everything that leads to happiness depends upon himself, and not upon other men, has adopted the very best plan for living happily. This is the man of moderation, the man of manly character and of wisdom"
