"If I ever saw an amputee getting hanged, I'd probably just start calling out letters"
About this Quote
The specific intent isn’t to mock amputees so much as to expose how reflexive our pattern-matching is. Even in a scenario that should demand horror, the mind reaches for the nearest familiar script: a word game. It’s a bleak little comment on cognition as coping mechanism. When reality gets unbearable, we translate it into something playable, solvable, smaller than it is. Comedy, in Martin’s hands, becomes a demonstration of that shrinking process.
Subtextually, it’s also about the audience’s complicity. The line makes you briefly visualize an amputee being hanged (a grotesque, unfair image), then invites you to laugh at the absurd response. The laugh catches in your throat because you recognize the dodge: the urge to manage discomfort with cleverness. Context matters: Martin’s persona is bookish, low-key, almost clinical. He’s not ranting; he’s diagramming. That restraint is why the joke lands as existential wordplay rather than cruelty: the punchline isn’t the amputee, it’s the speaker’s own ridiculous mental autopilot.
Quote Details
| Topic | Witty One-Liners |
|---|---|
| Source | Verified source: Demetri Martin. Person. (Demetri Martin, 2007)
Evidence: If I ever saw an amputee being hanged, I would just yell out letters.. The wording most often circulated online (“getting hanged, I'd probably just start calling out letters”) appears to be a paraphrase. Multiple independent transcript/quote references attribute the line to Demetri Martin’s Comedy Central TV special 'Demetri Martin. Person.' (first aired January 14, 2007). IMDb’s quote entry and ClipCafe’s timecoded transcript both match the 'being hanged / yell out letters' wording, suggesting the original spoken version is from that 2007 special, rather than a later book/interview publication. I did not locate an earlier primary source (e.g., a pre-2007 recorded set, book manuscript, or interview) that can be reliably dated earlier than the TV special via accessible primary documentation. Other candidates (1) The Mammoth Book of Jokes 2 (Geoff Tibballs, 2012) compilation93.3% ... She didn't wake up again . Mind you , she caused havoc in that dental practice . " If ever I saw an amputee getti... |
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Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Martin, Demetri. (2026, February 9). If I ever saw an amputee getting hanged, I'd probably just start calling out letters. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/if-i-ever-saw-an-amputee-getting-hanged-id-148836/
Chicago Style
Martin, Demetri. "If I ever saw an amputee getting hanged, I'd probably just start calling out letters." FixQuotes. February 9, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/if-i-ever-saw-an-amputee-getting-hanged-id-148836/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"If I ever saw an amputee getting hanged, I'd probably just start calling out letters." FixQuotes, 9 Feb. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/if-i-ever-saw-an-amputee-getting-hanged-id-148836/. Accessed 12 Feb. 2026.





