"In other words, I would be giving in to a myth of sameness which I think can destroy us"

Audre Lorde’s words highlight a profound critique of the assumption that individuals, in the name of unity or solidarity, must erase their differences and embrace a manufactured uniformity. The “myth of sameness” refers to the fiction that, for people to connect or cooperate, they must first suppress the unique elements of their identities, race, sexuality, gender, history, flattening out these distinctions to fit into a singular, homogeneous collective experience. Lorde challenges the idea that universal similarity is required for true understanding or social progress.

Rooted in her experiences as a Black lesbian feminist, Lorde’s insight targets well-meaning but often destructive tendencies within social movements and broader society, where difference is seen as a problem rather than a strength. She recognizes that to “give in” to this myth is to participate in a kind of erasure, neglecting the distinct stories, struggles, and perspectives that different individuals bring. This relinquishing of difference can lead to a dangerous emptiness at the heart of a community or movement, for when we deny our specific identities, we also deny the sources of our power, creativity, and wisdom.

Furthermore, the assertion that the myth “can destroy us” carries a warning: societies and groups that do not honor and make room for differences risk becoming brittle, disconnected, and unjust. The pressure to conform can silence those on the margins, replicate existing inequities, and ultimately lead to the collapse of authentic solidarity. Instead, Lorde advocates for the recognition of difference as an essential, generative force. Rather than pretending everyone is the same, true connection and coalition-building arise when people face and engage with their differences, learning from them and building bridges that honor the full spectrum of human experience. In affirming divergence rather than sameness, communities can cultivate richer, more resilient forms of unity.