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Humor & Life Quote by George Carlin

"May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house"

About this Quote

A blessing that refuses to play by blessing rules, Carlin's line swerves around piety and lands in the messy, practical world where "evil" feels less like a horned villain and more like the daily parade of scams, bad luck, and human cruelty. The genius is in the misdirection: instead of asking for protection, he asks for incompetence. Not "keep me safe", but "let whatever wants to hurt me get lost". It's a joke built on procedural failure, the same kind of cosmic clerical error that makes bureaucracy funny and terrifying at once.

The intent is classic Carlin: puncture the solemnity of traditional well-wishing while still admitting the desire underneath it. People say "God bless you" as if a divine security system is on call; Carlin keeps the structure of a benediction but swaps in a worldview where the universe isn't moral, it's chaotic. That small shift turns spiritual certainty into slapstick. Evil isn't defeated; it simply misses the exit.

Subtextually, it's also a quiet protest against the grand narratives we're sold: that good people are rewarded, that bad things happen for reasons, that someone is steering. Carlin's comedy often treats authority - religious, political, linguistic - as a con game. Here, the only realistic hope is confusion: not salvation, just a little misdirection in your favor.

Context matters. Late-20th-century American comedy was full of genteel setups; Carlin made profanity and skepticism into a public service announcement. This "prayer" is his signature mix of kindness and contempt: affectionate toward the person, ruthless toward the comforting fictions.

Quote Details

TopicWitty One-Liners
Source
Verified source: Playin' With Your Head ("Hello-Goodbye" routine) (George Carlin, 1986)
Text match: 100.00%   Provider: Cross-Reference
Evidence:
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. (null). This line is documented as being spoken in Carlin’s “Hello-Goodbye” routine, performed May 2, 1986 at the Beverly Theatre, Los Angeles, and broadcast/recorded as part of the HBO stand-up special/album Playin’ With Your Head. A later PRIMARY print appearance is in Carlin’s own book Napalm & Silly Putty (Hyperion, 2001) in the “Hello-Goodbye” section (per georgecarlin.net’s quote/album notes), but that would not be the first appearance if the 1986 performance is accepted as earliest.
Other candidates (1)
Humorous Wit (Djamel Ouis, 2020) compilation95.0%
... May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. George Carlin By swallowing evil words unsaid, n...
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Citation Formats

APA Style (7th ed.)
Carlin, George. (2026, February 17). May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/may-the-forces-of-evil-become-confused-on-the-way-7237/

Chicago Style
Carlin, George. "May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house." FixQuotes. February 17, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/may-the-forces-of-evil-become-confused-on-the-way-7237/.

MLA Style (9th ed.)
"May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house." FixQuotes, 17 Feb. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/may-the-forces-of-evil-become-confused-on-the-way-7237/. Accessed 22 Feb. 2026.

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May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house
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About the Author

George Carlin

George Carlin (May 12, 1937 - June 22, 2008) was a Comedian from USA.

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