"Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples"
About this Quote
Retirement is the setup; vanity is the punchline. George Burns takes a bureaucratic milestone - sixty-five, the age when society decides you’re “done” - and punctures it with the most adolescent detail imaginable: pimples. It’s funny because it’s absurd, but it’s also funny because it’s true in the Burns universe, where age is less a biological verdict than a costume you can refuse to wear.
The intent is classic Burns: turn the audience’s quiet dread about getting old into a laugh that feels like relief. By describing himself as still breaking out at sixty-five, he collapses the distance between “old” and “young,” mocking the idea that anyone becomes a different species when they qualify for Social Security. The subtext isn’t just “I felt young”; it’s “your timelines are arbitrary.” If adulthood can’t even promise clear skin, why should it promise neat stages like career, then retirement, then decline?
Context matters: Burns built a second (third?) act as a cultural anomaly, headlining and filming well into what most people consider the epilogue. His longevity became part of the act, but he never let it turn into sentimental inspiration. The line works because it’s anti-poster: no heroic grit, just a comic middle finger to life’s official paperwork. He’s selling a bracing idea in a throwaway gag: the body may age, the system may categorize you, but you can still keep a little youthful inconvenience - and with it, a little freedom.
The intent is classic Burns: turn the audience’s quiet dread about getting old into a laugh that feels like relief. By describing himself as still breaking out at sixty-five, he collapses the distance between “old” and “young,” mocking the idea that anyone becomes a different species when they qualify for Social Security. The subtext isn’t just “I felt young”; it’s “your timelines are arbitrary.” If adulthood can’t even promise clear skin, why should it promise neat stages like career, then retirement, then decline?
Context matters: Burns built a second (third?) act as a cultural anomaly, headlining and filming well into what most people consider the epilogue. His longevity became part of the act, but he never let it turn into sentimental inspiration. The line works because it’s anti-poster: no heroic grit, just a comic middle finger to life’s official paperwork. He’s selling a bracing idea in a throwaway gag: the body may age, the system may categorize you, but you can still keep a little youthful inconvenience - and with it, a little freedom.
Quote Details
| Topic | Witty One-Liners |
|---|---|
| Source | Attributed to George Burns; listed on Wikiquote (George Burns) and common quote collections — no primary source/date cited on page. |
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