"The last thing I stole was a box of Coca Cola from a parked truck in Adelaide. I was nice and drunk. It was New Year's Eve. And that was about 28 years ago"
About this Quote
The timing does heavy lifting. New Year’s Eve is culturally coded as an alibi season: everyone is a little unbuttoned, rules feel negotiable, the calendar itself implies a clean slate. “Nice and drunk” isn’t remorse so much as a humanizing haze, a way to outsource responsibility to atmosphere. “About 28 years ago” is the real pivot, turning criminality into nostalgia, the statute of limitations converted into a storytelling rhythm. He’s not confessing; he’s curating distance.
Biggs understood that modern notoriety runs on narrative control. This quote isn’t about honesty; it’s about calibration. He offers a harmless caper as the final entry in his criminal ledger, inviting the listener to file him under lovable rogue rather than habitual thief. The subtext is transactional: if you accept this as the endpoint, you’re tacitly accepting rehabilitation without the messy work of atonement. Coca Cola, Adelaide, drunkenness, the holiday: all carefully chosen props for a myth of harmlessness, delivered by a man who knew fame can launder a past by making it entertaining.
Quote Details
| Topic | Funny |
|---|---|
| Source | Help us find the source |
| Cite |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Biggs, Ronald. (2026, January 16). The last thing I stole was a box of Coca Cola from a parked truck in Adelaide. I was nice and drunk. It was New Year's Eve. And that was about 28 years ago. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/the-last-thing-i-stole-was-a-box-of-coca-cola-115916/
Chicago Style
Biggs, Ronald. "The last thing I stole was a box of Coca Cola from a parked truck in Adelaide. I was nice and drunk. It was New Year's Eve. And that was about 28 years ago." FixQuotes. January 16, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/the-last-thing-i-stole-was-a-box-of-coca-cola-115916/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"The last thing I stole was a box of Coca Cola from a parked truck in Adelaide. I was nice and drunk. It was New Year's Eve. And that was about 28 years ago." FixQuotes, 16 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/the-last-thing-i-stole-was-a-box-of-coca-cola-115916/. Accessed 12 Feb. 2026.





