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Humor & Life Quote by Henny Youngman

"While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake"

About this Quote

The joke works because it demolishes the polite fantasy of golf as serene, dignified leisure and replaces it with the blunt physics of slapstick. Youngman gives you a clean setup - a day on the course, the rare achievement of "two good balls" - then swerves hard into self-inflicted injury. The punchline lands not on athletic failure but on a different kind of incompetence: the everyday, humiliating kind. You can hit a perfect shot and still get taken out by yard work.

Youngman’s intent is classic one-liner misdirection: he invites the listener to imagine golf’s usual disappointments (slices, hooks, lost balls), then reveals a more absurd culprit. The phrasing matters. "I hit two good balls" is deliberately plain, almost proud, like a man reporting a minor moral victory. "I stepped on a rake" is equally blunt, a deadpan confession that turns that pride into instant ridicule. The comedy isn’t just in the rake-to-the-face cartoon image; it’s in how quickly success becomes punishment.

Subtextually, it’s a tiny parable about middle-class striving: you do what you’re supposed to do, you even do it well, and the universe still gets a cheap shot. The rake is also a perfect prop for golf’s culture of manicured control - the course as curated nature - reminding us that the tools meant to maintain order are often the ones that bite.

Context: mid-century American stand-up prized economy and persona. Youngman’s shtick was speed, sting, and self-deprecation. This line is built to travel: instantly visual, socially safe, and quietly contemptuous of anyone who thinks a good day on the links is a meaningful triumph.

Quote Details

TopicWitty One-Liners
Source
Later attribution: Golf, It's Just a Game (Bruce Lansky, 2011) modern compilationISBN: 9781451652444 · ID: q3IMkqpob08C
Text match: 95.00%   Provider: Google Books
Evidence:
... While playing golf today I hit two good balls . I stepped on a rake . -Henny Youngman If you drink , don't drive . Don't even putt . -Dean Martin I've had a good day when I don't fall out of the cart . -Buddy Hackett I know I'm getting ...
Cite

Citation Formats

APA Style (7th ed.)
Youngman, Henny. (2026, February 8). While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/while-playing-golf-today-i-hit-two-good-balls-i-19833/

Chicago Style
Youngman, Henny. "While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake." FixQuotes. February 8, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/while-playing-golf-today-i-hit-two-good-balls-i-19833/.

MLA Style (9th ed.)
"While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake." FixQuotes, 8 Feb. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/while-playing-golf-today-i-hit-two-good-balls-i-19833/. Accessed 10 Feb. 2026.

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Henny Youngman Golf Joke: Struck Two Balls, Hit by Rake
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About the Author

Henny Youngman

Henny Youngman (March 16, 1906 - February 24, 1998) was a Comedian from USA.

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