"While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake"
About this Quote
Youngman’s intent is classic one-liner misdirection: he invites the listener to imagine golf’s usual disappointments (slices, hooks, lost balls), then reveals a more absurd culprit. The phrasing matters. "I hit two good balls" is deliberately plain, almost proud, like a man reporting a minor moral victory. "I stepped on a rake" is equally blunt, a deadpan confession that turns that pride into instant ridicule. The comedy isn’t just in the rake-to-the-face cartoon image; it’s in how quickly success becomes punishment.
Subtextually, it’s a tiny parable about middle-class striving: you do what you’re supposed to do, you even do it well, and the universe still gets a cheap shot. The rake is also a perfect prop for golf’s culture of manicured control - the course as curated nature - reminding us that the tools meant to maintain order are often the ones that bite.
Context: mid-century American stand-up prized economy and persona. Youngman’s shtick was speed, sting, and self-deprecation. This line is built to travel: instantly visual, socially safe, and quietly contemptuous of anyone who thinks a good day on the links is a meaningful triumph.
Quote Details
| Topic | Witty One-Liners |
|---|---|
| Source | Later attribution: Golf, It's Just a Game (Bruce Lansky, 2011) modern compilationISBN: 9781451652444 · ID: q3IMkqpob08C
Evidence:
... While playing golf today I hit two good balls . I stepped on a rake . -Henny Youngman If you drink , don't drive . Don't even putt . -Dean Martin I've had a good day when I don't fall out of the cart . -Buddy Hackett I know I'm getting ... |
| Cite |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Youngman, Henny. (2026, February 8). While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/while-playing-golf-today-i-hit-two-good-balls-i-19833/
Chicago Style
Youngman, Henny. "While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake." FixQuotes. February 8, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/while-playing-golf-today-i-hit-two-good-balls-i-19833/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake." FixQuotes, 8 Feb. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/while-playing-golf-today-i-hit-two-good-balls-i-19833/. Accessed 10 Feb. 2026.







