"Each man must grant himself the emotions that he needs and the morality that suits him"

Remy de Gourmont’s assertion emphasizes the personal nature of emotional experience and ethical understanding, suggesting that each individual carries the responsibility, and the liberty, to define their own emotional responses and moral standards. The idea implicit here is not a denial of societal values or universal feelings, but a recognition that the inner landscape of every person is unique, shaped by memory, experience, temperament, and context. No external authority, whether it be tradition, religion, or prevailing cultural norms, can fully dictate what nourishes a heart or consoles a conscience.

Granting oneself the emotions that one needs points to a conscious engagement with feelings, honoring grief when loss occurs, allowing oneself joy in happiness, and accepting anger or fear if situations require. Rather than suppressing or denying emotions to fit into expected molds, one is urged to listen inwardly, allowing emotional honesty to flourish. Emotions are not merely instinctive reactions but can also be choices: to love rather than hate, to empathize instead of judge. Such emotional autonomy is a foundation for mental well-being and authenticity.

Choosing a morality that suits oneself speaks to an ethical self-determination. Rather than blindly adopting inherited codes or rigidly obeying external prescriptions, people are encouraged to critically reflect upon what is just or good for them. This does not advocate for selfish amorality; rather, it supports a thoughtful, individualized approach to moral living. One’s personal morality can be informed by cultural heritage, philosophical inquiry, and the voices of others, but ultimately must resonate with the individual’s conscience.

Such a philosophy challenges conformity and passivity, demanding that each person actively participate in crafting their emotional and moral world. It defends the primacy of self-awareness and personal growth. To live authentically is to recognize that true fulfillment and virtue arise not from external imposition, but from an honest, considered response to life that is genuinely one’s own.