"I submitted manuscripts to publishers. This was not so much a feeling that I should be published as a wish to escape the feared and hated drudgery of normal work"

In this quote, Tanith Lee provides a look into the mindset and internal inspirations that drove her early writing undertakings. On a surface level, the act of sending manuscripts to publishers appears to show an author's desire for recognition and recognition through publication. However, Lee exposes that her motivations were more complicated and perhaps somewhat non-traditional compared to the typical aiming author.

The expression "not so much a feeling that I must be released" recommends that Lee's primary inspiration wasn't the pursuit of literary recognition or the standard success connected with being a published author. Instead, this declaration introduces the concept that her drive originated from a much deeper, more individual requirement, or possibly even a practical factor to consider. Here, Lee's use of "should" suggests a decision that exceeds social or external expectations, hinting that her mission for publication wasn't merely about fulfilling an expected destiny or social trajectory, but rather about dealing with a more instant, personal issue.

Lee contrasts the absence of inherent need for publication with "a desire to leave the feared and hated drudgery of regular work". This part of the quote is crucial, as it reveals the underlying motivation: avoidance of a standard way of life perceived as dull and unrewarding. The words "feared and hated" imbue her sentiment with a strong psychological tone, showing that her hostility to conventionality was extensive and visceral.

This desire to leave recommends that Lee viewed composing as an opportunity for liberation-- creatively and existentially. Writing, for her, was an act of defiance versus settling into an unfulfilling regimen. It provided a chance to pursue a life that aligned more closely with her enthusiasms and goals. By seeking publication, Lee intended to carve out a different life trajectory, one that permitted imaginative flexibility, personal fulfillment, and a departure from societal norms.

In essence, this quote reflects Lee's view of composing not just as an art form but as a transformative tool efficient in reshaping one's life and circumventing the constraints of standard work. Her goals were less about external recognition and more about using her skill to chart a brand-new course towards individual liberation and creative autonomy.