"When a man marries his mistress it creates a job opportunity"
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James Goldsmith’s wry observation plays with the intersection of human nature, relationships, and society’s unwritten rules. When someone marries their mistress, the implication is that the role of “mistress” becomes vacant; the act of legitimizing the relationship elevates the mistress to the status of wife, rendering her previous position open. In this way, the remark takes a sardonic look at infidelity, recognizing that extramarital affairs often stem from desires or needs unmet in marriage. The humor comes from treating the clandestine role as a position that can simply be filled, like a job in a company.
The quip also reflects on the cyclical patterns of behavior that often define human relationships. It suggests that the underlying causes of infidelity, dissatisfaction, excitement, novelty, do not disappear with marriage; instead, they may simply be redirected. The implication is that individuals who were unfaithful in one circumstance might not change entirely, and the vacancy left behind could tempt others into similar situations. The process almost becomes institutionalized, expectedly so, as if there’s always a “job opening” for someone craving excitement outside of convention.
On a deeper level, Goldsmith’s words comment on the status dynamics in romantic relationships. The transformation of a mistress into a wife, with all of the social and legal recognition it entails, does not necessarily alter the impulses or habits of the people involved. The humor is mordant, hinting at skepticism toward the institution of marriage itself, how its exteriors may change while internal dynamics remain constant.
Finally, the statement critiques a certain social hypocrisy. Society often frowns upon mistresses, while tolerating or even celebrating marriages built on such foundations. By referring to the creation of a “job opportunity,” Goldsmith exposes the continuous potential for human fallibility, suggesting that the cycle of deceit and desire is self-perpetuating and ironically predictable.
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