Medical Quotes


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"Doctors will have more lives to answer for in the next world than even we generals"
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"Getting out of the hospital is a lot like resigning from a book club. You're not out of it until the computer says you're out of it"
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"I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso"
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"In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science"
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"Growing up, my dolls were doctors and on secret missions. I had Barbie Goes Rambo"
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"I'm by no means condemning prescription medicine for mental health. I've seen it save a lot of people's lives"
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"Honestly, being a doctor could make you more close minded than regular people"
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"Mammograms are really sort of a gift. You can either catch something early or count your lucky stars because nothing was discovered. Either way, you're ahead of the game"
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"I was always shocked when I went to the doctor's office and they did my X-ray and didn't find that I had eight more ribs than I should have or that my blood was the color green"
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"Flying back from New York, the flight attendant said 'God, I wished you were here yesterday, we had a stroke on the plane. I said, if I have a stroke on a plane, I hope the pretend doctor isn't the one on the plane. I want a real doctor"
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"America has the best doctors, the best nurses, the best hospitals, the best medical technology, the best medical breakthrough medicines in the world. There is absolutely no reason we should not have in this country the best health care in the world"
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"If you look at the human condition today, not everyone is well fed, has access to good medical care, or the physical basics that provide for a healthy and a happy life"
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"I'm strongly for a patient Bill of Rights. Decisions ought to be made by doctors, not accountants"
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"As a physician, I know many doctors want to utilize new technology, but they find the cost prohibitive"
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"A pregnant woman facing the most dire circumstances must be able to count on her doctor to do what is medically necessary to protect her from serious physical harm"
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"As a medical doctor, it is my duty to evaluate the situation with as much data as I can gather and as much expertise as I have and as much experience as I have to determine whether or not the wish of the patient is medically justified"
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"All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You'd be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men"
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"It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing"
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"The great secret of doctors, known only to their wives, but still hidden from the public, is that most things get better by themselves; most things, in fact, are better in the morning"
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"The doctors x-rayed my head and found nothing"
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"I'm 86 and my doctor used to tell me to slow down - at least he did until he dropped dead"
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"A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running"
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"When a man goes through six years training to be a doctor he will never be the same. He knows too much"
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"I regret to this day that I never went to college. I feel I should have been a doctor"
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"Three-quarters of the sicknesses of intelligent people come from their intelligence. They need at least a doctor who can understand this sickness"
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"Illness is the doctor to whom we pay most heed; to kindness, to knowledge, we make promise only; pain we obey"
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"Doctors are just the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too"
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"A physician's physiology has much the same relation to his power of healing as a cleric's divinity has to his power of influencing conduct"
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"In the name of Hypocrites, doctors have invented the most exquisite form of torture ever known to man: survival"
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"The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind; the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity"