"A marriage without conflicts is almost as inconceivable as a nation without crises"
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Andre Maurois draws a parallel between the institution of marriage and the life of a nation, highlighting the inevitability and even necessity of conflict within any close relationship or collective entity. Much like a nation faces crises, moments of tension, disagreement, or upheaval that test its resilience, marriage too is subject to periods of discord. The suggestion is not that conflict is inherently destructive, but rather that its presence is a natural part of intimate partnership.
Marriage unites two individuals, each with their own values, expectations, personalities, and histories. Inevitably, these differences spark disagreement. Such conflict is not a sign of failure, but evidence of the partners’ individuality and the dynamic nature of their bond. Suppressing all conflict to preserve harmony may give the appearance of peace, but at the cost of authentic connection and growth. The absence of conflict, according to Maurois, is so unlikely that it borders on the impossible, just as a nation entirely free of crises would be an anomaly in human history.
By using the term “almost as inconceivable,” Maurois acknowledges rare exceptions but underscores their extraordinary nature. Just as nations require crises to adapt, reform, and progress, marriages often benefit from confrontation and resolution. Through conflict, spouses renegotiate boundaries, express needs, and deepen mutual understanding. The process of working through disagreements can strengthen the relationship, fostering intimacy and trust.
This perspective encourages a reframing of marital discord not as a defect to be eliminated, but as a normal, even necessary, aspect of a living partnership. It reminds us that struggle, when engaged with respect and care, is compatible with love, and can ultimately lead to greater harmony, mirroring how nations ultimately emerge stronger from their own periods of crisis. Thus, conflict is woven into the very fabric of enduring unions, signaling vitality rather than dysfunction.
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