"A wedding is just like a funeral except that you get to smell your own flowers"

Grace Hansen’s observation draws a parallel between two major life events, weddings and funerals, highlighting their shared ceremonial aspects while underscoring their ultimate difference. Both occasions gather loved ones, summon rituals, and feature symbolic gestures such as the giving of flowers. At a funeral, flowers serve as tokens of affection, respect, and memory for someone who will never again see or smell them. The gathering is one of mourning, remembrance, and unspoken appreciation for the life that has ended. The departed becomes the silent center of attention, while words of love and honor are spoken too late for their ears.

A wedding, in contrast, marks a beginning, a celebration filled with hope, companionship, and the active participation of the people at its center. Flowers abound at weddings as symbols of beauty, happiness, fertility, and new chapters; they are chosen, arranged, and cherished. The person at the heart of a wedding, unlike at a funeral, is present to witness their community’s joy, to hear the well-wishes, to linger in the fragrance and meaning of every flower. Every tender word, every token of affection, every celebration of character and love is something the couple receives directly, in real time.

Hansen’s remark simultaneously hints at the irony and poignancy of how people often express their deepest feelings, sometimes only at life’s milestones. The parallel she draws offers a gentle reminder to show appreciation, affection, and honor while loved ones are still alive and present to receive them. Weddings become special not simply for their happiness, but for the consciousness with which they allow a person to experience the adoration of friends and family, to, as she says, smell their own flowers. It is a bittersweet insight about presence, gratitude, and the fleeting nature of acknowledgment in our lives.